Divorce can be a challenging experience for anyone to navigate, with or without children. For parents of special needs children, however, divorce can be an even more difficult and complex undertaking. If you are facing divorce with a special needs child in the Mesa area or anywhere in Arizona, do not hesitate to reach out to our office to connect with our compassionate team. At Sullivan Shick, we make it our mission to support our clients as individuals whose lives are being redefined by the struggles they face, and we are here to listen and recognize your human needs as a person and a parent, first and foremost. Call (480) 719-2558 to schedule a conversation to discuss your concerns.
What Percentage of Marriages With Special Needs Children End in Divorce?
A 2015 author manuscript available through the National Library of Medicine notes conflicting reports regarding the correlation of divorce rates with parenting special needs children. Some of the disparities in research findings may have been due to differences in study design, with distinct studies examining parents of children with specific categories of disabilities or at specific stages of the child’s lifecycle, from infancy through adulthood for children who need sustained support throughout their lives. The wide array of variables can make it difficult to get a clear picture of how divorce rates among parents of children with special needs compare to divorce rates among the general population; nevertheless, the perception persists that parenting special needs children can contribute to marital strife.
Why Do Special Needs Parents Get Divorced?
For concerned parents, contemplating the prospect of divorce with a special needs child, in many cases the central question to be answered is not “What role did parenting a special needs child play in getting a divorce?” but rather “How can I continue to take care of my special needs child during a divorce?” The answer to this latter question will depend to some extent on the nature and extent of the child’s disability, along with other factors such as the child’s age and personality and the quality of their rapport with each parent.
At the same time, however, a family’s handling of divorce with a special needs child will need to rest on the same basic principles as any other divorce involving children. These basic principles start with putting the best interests of the child first, and include clear communication appropriate to the child’s age and understanding, regular quality time with both parents, and maintaining a safe environment supportive of the child’s needs as a growing human, not just their needs stemming from disability.
Maintaining Stability
The relative importance of “stability” in home life for children with special needs, as compared to the significance of the same factor for their peers, will depend to some extent on the type of needs the child has. A child with primarily physical disabilities may be more concerned with accessibility issues during a transition between households, whereas developmental disabilities can make it extremely challenging for children of any age (into adulthood) to embrace and adapt to sudden changes in their home environments and daily routines.
Regardless of the age of the child or the type of disability involved, parents can set their new family life up for success by working together, early and often, to coordinate schedules and ensure as much continuity as possible between households as they establish separate homes. Allowing the child to bring familiar objects from one home to another can sometimes be helpful, as can collaborating to ensure that any assistive devices the child relies on are available at each parent’s residence.
Co-Parent Coordination
Many people seeking a divorce want to spend as little time as possible in communication with their soon-to-be ex. However, divorce with a special needs child requires careful coordination to ensure that the child’s needs continue to be met as the family structure changes. Effective co-parenting may require parents to set aside their differences in order to collaboratively manage medical appointments, coordinate schedules to ensure that both parties have one-on-one time with the child, and establish continuity of care as the parents settle into separate households.
Post-Majority Support for Disabled Adult Children
Arizona courts may order extended child support payments for the financial maintenance of disabled adult children in some circumstances, under § 25-320 Ariz. Rev. Stat. (2023). However, a finding of incapacity for the adult child as described in § 25-1501 Ariz. Rev. Stat. (2023) may be necessary before the court will issue such an order. Discussing the possibility of such an outcome in advance, and carefully documenting the responsibilities each parent is prepared to assume if there is a likelihood the child may need lifelong care, can help to minimize conflict between the co-parents while ensuring continuity of care for the child.
The degree to which a special needs child may need ongoing care into adulthood is another consideration that will likely depend to a large extent on the nature of the child’s disability. Many children with physical disabilities are able to make successful transitions into independent adulthood and establish careers for themselves that support a self-sufficient lifestyle. For many families with special needs children, however, the potential need to establish guardianships or conservatorships as the child enters their majority may need to be addressed. If you have questions about your legal options for supporting your special needs child into adulthood as a divorced parent, consider speaking with an experienced Arizona family law attorney from Sullivan Shick to discuss the specifics of your situation.
Parenting Plans for Special Needs Children
Divorcing parents are encouraged to work together to develop a joint parenting plan they can submit to the court. Child custody and visitation issues – both of which Arizona considers under the single heading of “parenting time” – can be contentious, however, and if the parents are not able to reach a consensus then each parent must submit to the court an independent plan that covers not only parenting time but the allocation of legal decision-making responsibility, and that also outlines relevant procedures for the transport of children between households, to and from school and related activities, and other common practical considerations.
Adapting Your Parenting Plan for a Special Needs Child
§ 25-403.02 Ariz. Rev. Stat. (2023) outlines the essential elements a parenting plan submitted to the court must cover. However, the statute does not directly address how parents should address special medical or developmental support needs as they craft their plans. Making provisions for the foreseeable needs of your special needs child during the development of your parenting plan can help to minimize friction farther down the road.
Some elements parents may wish to consider within the framework of the Arizona parenting plan requirements include:
Legal Decision-Making Responsibilities
Determine whether legal decision-making will be joint or sole, considering the child’s best interests and the parents’ ability to work together. Arizona family law courts generally tend to err on the side of assuming that both parents should share decision-making responsibilities, so it may be helpful for parents to approach this portion of their plan with the assumption that the court will expect both parties to be involved in the day-to-day decisions impacting the child’s care.
Rights and Responsibilities for Everyday Care
Outline each parent’s rights and responsibilities for the child’s personal care, including medical decisions, therapies, and daily routines. This can also be a good place to make detailed arrangements for the allocation of financial responsibility for the child’s special needs, such as medical expenses and therapies.
Parenting Time Schedule
Arizona courts require parents to submit a “practical” schedule for the allocation of their parenting time. For parents of disabled children, a practical schedule will likely require taking into account the child’s special needs, such as medical appointments, therapies, and school activities. Particularly if the child is in a delicate physical condition that requires regular or extensive treatments, both parties may need to show some flexibility here in order to put the best interests of the child first.
Handling Exchanges
Many families take this portion of the parenting plan as their opportunity to highlight the need for a neutral exchange location or the presence of a support person during exchanges, but co-parents of special needs children may also wish to establish “ground rules” here for ensuring that the exchange setting and the people present will not only safe but accessible. In some cases, establishing a predictable time and location for exchanges may assist in maintaining a consistent routine for the child.
Resolving Disputes
All parenting plans will need to outline how the parties will handle disagreements as they arise, as well as procedures for addressing any alleged breaches of the parenting plan. Dispute resolution methods may include mediation, conciliation services, or private counseling. Co-parents of special needs children may wish to explicitly address when and how they will proceed to involve professionals with expertise in special needs, such as a child psychologist or social worker.
Regular Review
Arizona law imposes a requirement for parenting plans to make some provision for periodic review to ensure that the plan is continuing to function and serve the best interests of the child. The parenting plan for a special needs child may need to outline not only a schedule for such review, but specific criteria that can help both parents, and any professionals involved in the child’s care, to identify any changes in the child’s needs and evaluate the plan’s effectiveness in meeting them.
Communication Between Parents
Parents of special needs children may need to be especially clear about their mutual expectations for communication about the child’s needs and well-being, including methods (e.g., phone calls, emails, parenting apps) and frequency. Using a shared parenting journal or online platform to document important information about the child’s care and progress can help busy co-parents to stay up-to-date on potential issues they may need to be aware of, during their parenting time or as they consider future plans for and with the child.
Flexible and Customizable Parenting and Plans
Each special needs child and family is unique, and the parenting plan should be tailored to meet their specific needs and circumstances. Consider working with legal professionals, child development experts, and other sources of knowledge and support to ensure that the parenting plan addresses your child’s best interests and provides a supportive and stable environment for their growth and development.
The Best Interests of the Child Standard
Even when the divorcing parents submit a plan to the court that has the full agreement of both parties, the plan will still be subject to court approval. Regardless of whether the court accepts portions of the parents’ submitted plans, the judge in the case will make a final determination based not on the parents’ preferences but on the “best interests of the child” standard. Commonly applied in child custody cases throughout the United States, the best interests of the child standard seeks to put children’s needs, rather than parental convenience, first in determining how custodial rights and responsibilities will be distributed.
Consider Obtaining Legal Support for a Divorce With a Special Needs Child
Divorce can always be difficult, stressful, and heart-wrenching. Divorce with a special needs child can present an additional set of factors an already-struggling parent needs to consider. However, parents do not have to shoulder the responsibilities of caring for a special needs child while navigating the complexities of the divorce process all alone. If you are navigating the complex process of divorce with a special needs child anywhere in Arizona, consider giving Sullivan Shick a call today at (480) 719-2558 to set up a consultation to discuss your family’s needs.